Being Fully Alive By Dan Miller

Ok, so every now and then, i’m minding my own business doing my reading when I come across something that completely blows my mind. This article is one of those things. It’s by Dan Miller of 48days to the work you love and No More Mondays fame and it’s all about the options we miss out on in life because we don’t think creatively. I don’t want to ruin it with my blithering so just read and be blessed.

Here’s a short illustrative story (excerpted from No More Mondays):

There May Be More Solutions Than What You First See …

Many years ago in an Indian village, a farmer had the misfortune of owing a large sum of money to the village moneylender. The old and ugly moneylender fancied the farmer’s beautiful daughter, so he proposed a bargain. He would forgive the farmer’s debt if he could marry his daughter. Both the farmer and his daughter were horrified by the proposal, but the cunning moneylender suggested that they let providence decide the matter. He told them that he would put a black pebble and a white pebble into an empty money bag. The girl would have to reach in and pick one pebble from the bag. If she picked the black pebble, she would become his wife and her father’s debt would be forgiven.  If she picked the white pebble, she need not marry him and her father’s debt would still be forgiven. If she refused to pick a pebble, her father would be thrown into jail until the debt was paid.  They were standing on a pebble-strewn path in the farmer’s field. As they talked, the moneylender bent over to pick up two pebbles. The sharp-eyed girl noticed that he had picked up two black pebbles and put them into the bag. He then asked the girl to pick a pebble. Now, imagine that you were the girl standing in the field. What would you have done? If you had to advise her, what would you have told her?

Careful analysis would produce three possibilities: (1) The girl could refuse to take a pebble—but her father would then be thrown in jail. (2) The girl could pick a black pebble and sacrifice herself in order to save her father from debt and imprisonment. Or (3) The girl could pull out both black pebbles in the bag, expose the moneylender as a cheat, and likely incite his immediate revenge.  Take a moment to think through this story. I’ve used it with the hope that it will help you see alternate solutions beyond the obvious ones. The girl’s dilemma cannot be solved with traditional logical thinking. You may be in a similar situation. You may be in a job you hate—but the pay is great. You have two choices: (1) You can stay in a job you hate. (2) You can leave the job but will then give up the great pay. Are these really all the options?

Here is what the girl did.  She put her hand into the money bag and drew out a pebble.  Without looking at it, she fumbled and let it fall onto the pebble strewn path, where it immediately became lost among all the other pebbles. “Oh, how clumsy of me,” she said. “But never mind, if you look into the bag for the one that is left, you will be able to tell which pebble I picked.” Since the remaining pebble was black, it would have to be assumed that she had picked the white one. And since the moneylender dared not admit his dishonesty, the girl would have changed what seemed an impossible situation into an extremely advantageous one.  Now, how could you see more creative solutions for your situation?

Now let’s go back to that teacher – remember the one who wondered if she should be in the school that aligned with her values but didn’t pay much – or in one that paid double but conflicted with much of what she believed.  Did she perhaps have options she was not seeing?
Here’s a related example –

Several years ago Jim was eager for a change.  He had an academic background but was just exiting a career in the military.  Over a casual dinner conversation his wife asked Jim, “If money were not important, what would you do?” Jim responded immediately, “I’d sit around the house and read old history books.” Guess what Jim does today. He reads old history books. He creates audio CDs as he brings to life old historical novels with his dramatic, engaging readings. With primarily a home schooling customer base, children beg to hear the next installment as they are simultaneously learning the rich stories from history. Recently I received this note from Jim – “Just thought you’d like to know that, doing what I love, my profits increased this year to over 104K.  A great year for me that was a lot of fun and a lot of work.  All with a seven second commute.”

If you created ten alternatives for moving forward rather than just two, what are the chances you could uncover an application that allows you to engage your passion – and make more money than you ever imagined?

Dan Miller, President of 48 Days, specializes in creative thinking for increased personal and business success.  Dan is the author of the widely acclaimed 48 Days To The Work You Love andNo More Mondays.  He writes regularly for many popular magazines and web portals, including CBN.com, Crosswalk.com, New Man, AARP and Success magazine.

The Apprentice prepares a bucket

It has come to my attention through a lot of my reading lately, that it’s impossible to live a rich life without having a set of goals and dreams to work towards and achieve. Letting life just happen to you and push you around isn’t my idea of fun. That has been the description of my last 30 years.How many times have you asked yourself that proverbial question “I wonder where I’ll be/ who I’ll be in 10years?” Well I now understand that unless you decide where or who you want to be in the future, you’re very likely to be disappointed where you end up. So in that light, I’ve been working on my goals and dreams lately and I thought I’d share what is popularly known as “the bucket list”; a list of things I want to do or experience before I die but in my case, I want to do this before I’m 40.

An Apprentice’s Bucket List before I’m 40

1. To ride a camel and climb the steps of the great pyramids of Giza in Egypt. I also need a cool picture with the sphinx with a broken nose.
2. Go snorkeling on a coral reef especially the Great Barrier Reef in Australia.
3. Take a Safari game drive with my family in the Masai Mara or Serengeti. I’d love for a lion or leopard to jump on the roof of the landrover!
4. To climb a mountain, Rwenzori will do.
5. Learn how to ski/ snowboard and then do so on the Swiss Alps.
6. Take a professional defensive driving or racing course
7. Drive a Porsche, Lamborghini or any other super car
8. Serenade my wife as we ride a Gondola in Venice.
9. Give away 100,000,000 UGX or more to church, charity and aid of humanity.
10. Take a 3week Caribbean cruise.
11. Gain 15 kilos of abs, biceps and Pecs!
12. See the entire solar system via giant telescope.
13. Listen to a philharmonic symphony orchestra live.
14. Go to a Broadway show.
15. Go for T.D Jakes Manpower conference.
16. Take my wife and daughter for horse riding on a real horse ranch!
17. Go to the E3 Electronic Entertainment Expo in Vegas!  Yes, i’m a geek!
18. Go Sky diving
19. Visit an walk through Aquarium with my daughter
20. Tour Asia via the Orient Express.
21. Visit the Himeji white castle in Japan
22. Go sand dune riding in Dubai
23. Visit the Eiffel tower and sip coffee and croissants at a traditional street café in Paris
24. Set up a ministry to mentor, encourage and equip men to be Men!
25. Learn how to Fly a helicopter!

This is just a short list as I continue exercising my faith to open up new possibilities. I’d love to hear some of your own bucket lists. I might be dreaming too small. Let get each other pumped up and encourage one another.

Shalom

JOHN DEWEY: Without some goals and some efforts to reach it, no man can live.

ROBERT H. SCHULLER: Goals are not only absolutely necessary to motivate us. They are essential to really keep us alive.

Truths about borrowing money that I’ve learned from loan sharks

It seems like in this world we live in today, it’s impossible to actually live without borrowing money. Everywhere you turn either yourself or someone you know is indebted.

Well over the last several weeks, a series of events all related to loan sharks and borrowed money have opened my eyes to certain truths that I’d like to share with you today. It’s my hope that you and I will see the fallacy of this dangerous lifestyle of borrowing that we are unconsciously comfortable with.

Lesson 1: Luzira express. Failure to pay debts is a criminal offence punishable with jail time.

Ok, this one I honestly didn’t know but it’s a scary fact. Even if you owe someone 10,000UGX and they take you to court over failure to pay, well you can be sentenced to jail time. I came to learn this lesson by the unwarranted instruction of a two loan sharks to whom my brothers were indebted. Suffice to say, they both have been arrested and only released upon lots of lobbying. I never used to get it but the basic principle is that getting you arrested is a strong arm technique by the sharks to force your friends and family to cough up the money in order to save you a one way trip to luzira. Now that used to piss me off but later I learnt that it’s actually a criminal offence to fail to pay your debts. A lot of us take it for granted that if we don’t pay our debts, what’s the worst that can happen? Well a couple of months in Luzira could happen. Take an example of those oh so popular salary loans we yuppies like to take out. A guy I know who works at a certain standard bank actually encouraged me to defraud my bank by taking a huge loan and not paying by simply saying I don’t have a job anymore so I can’t pay. Sounds really sweet eh? All that cash with no downside. Well a week ago I discovered that banks can actually take you to court and prosecute you all the way to cell block D if you fail to pay. So lesson, failure to pay your debts is tantamount to theft and you are a criminal if you don’t.

Lesson 2: The Borrower is the slave to the Lender

This one I first saw in the bible. Proverbs 22:7 says the Rich rules over the poor and the Borrower is a servant to the lender. This is a simple lesson I’ve seen in my own life and the life of many of my loved ones. When you borrow money, you are indebted to the person or system that lent you the money. Which means, in order to get your freedom back, you need to do everything in your power to pay them back. It is in the process of paying back that you become a slave. You go to work to day in day out to earn money to pay off your creditors. Trust me I’ve been there. Giving away half my salary every month to pay off some debts. Missing out on all the wonderful things I could have been doing with that money and at the same time shrinking my life to fit in the paltry salary that remained. Not even being able to buy a pair of shoes or a shirt. I began to loathe my job and my very existence because it seemed like I was working for my creditors. Others become insomniacs, get high blood pressure etc. Point is, you lose your freedom and become a slave till you clear that debt.

Lesson 3: Never stand surety for anyone. Period!

I don’t need to say too much about this one. It’s also biblical. Proverbs 6:1 says “My child, suppose you agree to pay the debt of someone, who cannot repay a loan. Then you are trapped by your own words,” and Proverbs 17:18 “It’s stupid to guarantee someone else’s loan.” Subtle!

I needn’t say any more about the folly of standing surety. What is surety you ask? Surety is simply guaranteeing a loan on someone else’s behalf. Failure of that person to pay means that you pay the outstanding amount. Now the problem with this is, a lot of people have no problem defaulting on their loans leaving you to face the music. Besides, by the time someone asks you to stand surety for them, they believe you are a Mugaga. Worse still though, if the person fails to pay, and you can’t pay either, well, it’s off to luzira for both of you! Back to the example of my brothers. One of them stood surety for a cousin who failed to pay. Guess who was picked up at his office by the police? Yep, my brother. Only some frantic running around spared him a one way trip to Luza’s. The prisons bus spent the whole afternoon eagerly waiting just for my bro. So key lesson, any failure to pay by the person is your failure as the one who stood surety. You are just as liable. So, as for standing surety, as the old adage goes, JUST SAY NO!

Lesson 4: Borrowing can ruin your reputation, your relationships and your life

Ok now this one I have seen way up close. A very close cousin of mine is like 5000 feet deep in debts to banks, loan sharks, friends and family. He hasn’t had a job for the last 6months. Several people in my family have had brushes with harassment and arrest because of standing surety for his loans. To put it mildly, they don’t ever want to see him ever again. His name isn’t even supposed to be mentioned. It’s like in Harry Potter, the reference to the villain is generally ““He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named”. There, relationships destroyed. Nobody in their even wildly, intoxicated frame of mind would touch him with a ten foot pole. He has been marked by the new Credit Reference Bureau as a “Delinquent borrower” so he can never borrow from any bank in Uganda for a minimum period of 7years or is it 10? Whatever, the point is reputation destroyed. If he gets arrested by any one of multiple creditors, he’ll have a criminal record to deal with all the rest of his days. Plus there are ripple effects. When I looked at my other brother facing arrest for some loans, I couldn’t help think, so what happens to his wife and kids if he’s incarcerated? Who looks after them when the creditors take all their property to clear their dues? Their lives would also be destroyed. So no reputation, relationships or life.

Lesson 5: Borrowing is a sign of selfishness, impatience and indiscipline

Now don’t get me wrong. Not all borrowing is bad. But habitual borrowing underlines a much bigger problem. Why do you borrow? Simply because you want something but you don’t have the patience to wait to get it. It’s about instant gratification. I must have it now. We live in a generation where we expect everything to be instant and to get it with the least possible work. Borrowing is the path of least resistance. You want a car? Get a bank loan to buy it now even though in reality, you can’t afford it. You want to impress that girl? Borrow from your work buddies to take her to rock night and buy her black label. Spent all your salary paying for that really expensive apartment? Just borrow some money to see you through the remaining 3weeks of the month. Get the picture? Borrowing arises from selfish, impatient desire to have things that we can’t afford in the moment (and probably shouldn’t anyway) and we don’t have the discipline to live within our means and save towards getting that thing debt free. I’m definitely not perfect. I wanted a car so badly and I couldn’t wait so I borrowed money at an exorbitant interest rate and spent 2years paying for a car that in the end, I don’t even like that much! What’s more, the car isn’t even worth half what I borrowed now. Sigh. Even worse, we borrow to pay debts! Don’t even get me started about that crazy cycle. So lesson, if you are habitually in debt, it’s time to have a long, hard and brutally honest examination of yourself and your lifestyle. You might be shocked at what you discover about yourself.

So these are a few critical lessons I’ve learnt about borrowing. I’m sure i’ going to learn more as these situations in the family are being cleared up. My wife and I generally live by a strict agreement to never borrow unless it’s a matter of life and death or if it’s for investment. Otherwise, we’d rather starve than borrow and believe me, there have been times when we did. I must say though, after all the drama I’ve seen courtesy of loan sharks these past 6weeks, I’m so thankful we took this stand. I’d rather starve in my own house than have to worry about being made someone’s b@*$h! Now this advice is difficult for most but if you want peace in your life, and you want to avoid Luza’s, just stay away from borrowing. I’d love to hear some of your own loan shark stories and lessons so hit me.

Shalom

“Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.” Romans 13:8

“But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” Phil 4:19

Who goeth a borrowing, Goeth a sorrowing.
~Thomas Tusser

Debt, n.  An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
~Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary, 1911

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you set about retiring them.
Ogden Nash

Be assured that it gives much more pain to the mind to be in debt, than to do without any article whatever which we may seem to want.
Thomas Jefferson

Live within your means, never be in debt, and by husbanding your money you can always lay it out well. But when you get in debt you become a slave. Therefore I say to you never involve yourself in debt, and become no man’s surety. If your friend is in distress, aid him if you have the means to spare. If he fails to be able to return it, it is only so much lost.
Andrew Jackson